Tuesday, March 29, 2016

Finding clues

In our everyday conversations I hunt for clues
looking for a new word, that will end this isolated struggle
like a child looking for his friends
in a game of hide and seek
The universe might have conspired
or the stars would have fallen to mark that moment
to let this gigantic catastrophe happen. Or not?
Even after a thousand phone calls and 
hundreds of e-mails, I still wonder who you are?
Are you the eager four year old boy I knew
whose queries never seemed to end, 
or the bored loveless flirt who feasts on 
carcasses of lustful women.
Sometimes when I pass by the places I had wanted 
to visit with you, I count the yellow beacons
drifting past me, their brightness blinds my vision.
I still wear the million dollar smile 
I bought for a discount from my family
try to keep my hair straight like a runaway model
and pick at an uninvited pimple, that may leave behind a scar
brown, ugly and stubborn
what if you decided to meet me again
And find me to be someone else, not the reed thin doll
you had wanted to carry around like an arm candy
Still lost in a series of hints, I surrender my arms
and begin a new battle, of telling myself
to stop wishing on a star.